“H-h-hello?,” stammered a voice on the other end of the line, it’s owner sounding like he had enjoyed a very, VERY good Saturday night.

“Bobby…it’s Pin, I…”

“N-no, I can’t play…I can’t…sorry.”

And so the first attempt to find an eleventh player fifteen minutes before kick-off on Sunday morning had failed. The OHAFC Vets had been left in a spot, Harry Hoffen deciding his back was unable to take the strain and helpfully informing his captain a quarter of an hour before the bare eleven were due to take the field against Malvern in the first round of the Derrick Moore Veterans Cup.

Further frantic calls from skipper Wyn-Evans followed, desperately trying to find an OH who a/ lived within a reasonable distance of the Bank of England Ground and b/ were not in as bad a state from the night before as Bobby Tindall.

The winner of the lucky dip was Ben Durling, a regular for many of the friendlies during the season and willing and able to hot foot it over from Barnes for the game.

Amidst all the fretting over Hoffen’s no-show and the desperate search for a replacement, it had nearly gone unnoticed that another key player in the side, centre-half Nick Warner, had still not arrived. Countdown to kick-off now read T minus five minutes.

Still, there was some encouraging news to be had down on the pitches. Malvern’s team, apparently warming-up, appeared to contain a number of veterans who had clearly passed the over-35 qualifying age many moons ago – one of them was a spitting image of guitarist Brian May. On first glance it seemed as though his skills on a football pitch would fall some way short of his skills with the guitar. It was up to Ed Thorn to burst the bubble: “I don’t think we’re playing this lot actually,” Ed said cheerfully. “Are you Old Malvernians?” “No mate, never heard of them.”

Lederman thought about asking if he was actually Brian May too, but he wouldn’t have had to time to talk to him anyway given that kick-off, on a pitch five minutes’ walk away, was due in two minutes.

So at the appointed hour of ten thirty, the OHAFC Vets arrived at the correct pitch with the grand total of nine players. Slightly short of the ideal eleven required to compete in a game of football and some way short of the fourteen Malvernians who were in the middle of a fairly impressive warm-up.

Referee Colin Busby kindly delayed the start to allow Warner to take the field in time, although in hindsight this may actually have hindered the efforts of the ten men in the opening spell, such was the lethargy of the self-styled ‘fastest man in the League.’ Indeed, his well-known moniker (born many years ago when his Reptonian marker responded to his captain’s plea to tighten his marking with ‘How can I get closer? He’s the quickest player in the League…’) seemed ill-fitting given that he was up against former Rep team midfielder Tom James, someone who had clearly kept his pace a lot longer than the soon-to-be forty-five years old Warner.

Several long balls over the top left Warner and Baddeley seemingly running in treacle whilst Malvern’s front man went close on a number of occasions, Harrow just managing to scramble his crosses clear or watch with relief as shots missed their mark. The arrival of Ben Durling, whilst evening up the numbers, did little to even up the balance of play.

It was little surprise therefore that the visitors took the lead after twenty minutes from such an attack, James latching onto a ball over the top, rounding ‘keeper Jon Ingram and calmly slotting home. The lead was doubled inside ten minutes, Lederman ceding possession in midfield and watching in horror as the ball was slipped down the inside right channel before being fired past Ingram from close range.

The Malvernians didn’t have it their own way however and at the other end Harrow did manage to create several chances. Dom Danos was gallantly ploughing a lone furrow up front but with support from midfield arriving in the shape of Baker, Molloy and Lederman the hosts were able to muster several half chances.

Nevertheless, the key moment prior to half-time came back at the other end courtesy of yet another ball over the top for Tom James to run onto. Sprinting clear, a third goal for Malvern seemed inevitable but Jon Ingram pulled off a fine save, stretching out his right hand to block the shot and ensure the sides would change ends with the hosts still just about in touch.

The second half was more even as Malvern’s forward gradually tired and Harrow’s defence gradually woke up. But chances for the hosts were at a premium, with too many passes going astray in midfield and Danos unable to hold the ball up sufficiently against the entire Malvern back four.

Harrow got themselves back into the game midway through the half courtesy of a set-piece, Lederman’s long ball into the box met well by Baddeley in mid-air but when his first effort was blocked he reacted quickest of all to smash the ball in from close range.

The goal clearly lifted the hosts and they began to sense that all was not lost. An equaliser followed courtesy of a superb run from Baker, who slalomed between three or four defenders before chipping the ball to Lederman on the right of the penalty area. He crossed for Danos to sidefoot home from six yards out and a game that for long spells had looked lost was now back in the balance.

The final twenty minutes saw both sides slightly fearful of conceding again and there were few chances created meaning extra-time, something no-one wanted, was required. During the break in play it was clear that the Harrovians were in a worse state than their Malvernian counterparts. Molloy and Lederman, having played the day before, were running on empty and several others were close to exhaustion. But with no substitutes there was nothing else to do but press on.

Malvern scored a third midway through the opening period of extra time, yet another long ball causing unnecessary difficulties at the back and again the tie appeared to be swinging the way of the visitors. Harrow were unfortunate not to at least have a chance at an equaliser moments later when Warner delivered an excellent ball up the line for Lederman to chase but, with just one man to beat, the referee whistled for a throw-in after some spurious appeals from the Malvern substitutes.

The final period of extra-time saw both sides out on their feet, Malvern content to sit back and restrict efforts on their goal. The plan worked until less than ten minutes from time when Baker and Warner combined on the edge of the box, the former feeding Lederman down the left side of the penalty area and the winger cut in to plant a shot inside the near post.

Malvern were furious at again seeing their lead slip but worse was to come for the visitors. With a penalty shoot-out just three minutes away, Lederman followed Molloy’s signal for a far post cross at a corner and the midfielder duly responded, planting his header down into the ground and past the defender on the line from only a couple of yards out to complete a famous comeback.

It was another remarkable turnaround from the OHAFC Vets, who once again showed that whilst they may not be the best organised side in the competition, they have a never-say-die attitude that can carry them past superior opposition.

All eleven who played the one hundred and twenty minutes deserve great credit for their efforts, with the dressing room at the end of the game resembling a scene out of mash, exhausted bodies strewn across the benches as even sitting down became a painful task. Phil Berry made an excellent debut at right-back and Dom Danos kept going throughout despite playing the whole game up front on his own. Jon Ingram was another standout performer with his excellent save in the first half keeping Harrow hopes alive.

The side now face Forest in the quarter-finals in what is sure to be another tough test but with the confidence of this result behind them there is no reason why another upset cannot be sprung.

OHAFC Vets XI v Malvern (4-5-1):

Ingram; Berry, Warner, Baddeley, Durling; Lederman, Molloy, Baker, Thorn, Wyn-Evans(c); Danos